Phone Sex and Sheman

Late last evening I was horny and hubby was asleep after an exhausting day of work.  So for the first time in a long time I busted out my vibrator and dusted her off.  I started perusing the porn sites and finding it utterly boring.  I peeked over at my Yahoo messenger and I notice my favorite bad boy BJ is online.  So I drop him quick message and off to the races we went!

I told him I was horny and that he should turn is webcam on for me.  He just happened to be in the same mood. So I asked him to masturbate for me.  It thrilled me that he was accommodating as he set up his camera and out came the cock. 

I found this more exciting than watching porn.  Since he could not see me, I had to tell him what I was doing with my vibrator and it was quite erotic.  Towards the end he said I should call him to help him finish off.  So I thought, what the heck and called him. 

Phone sex is old school but overall it can be more erotic and exciting than watching porn.  It was quite enjoyable listening to him cum as I watching him on the cam.  Even though my orgasms with the toy aren’t the same as the real thing, it did take the edge off things.

We are in the works of planning a date sometime soon.  This put a guilty feeling in me as in reference of Sheman.  I would have to tell her about this guy and another relatively soon.   And I suppose I should clue her in on the MFM party too.  LOL   Yeah, it be a good idea.

It wasn’t that hard telling her.   By the easiest means necessary; via text.  Her response was “Please be safe”.  I laughed out loud at this because I had not mentioned the party yet. Messaging her back I said “Oh well, then you are going to love this next part!”  I informed her of the upcoming party and I think she took it well. Sorta. Her main concern was that I was ending it with her.  The jury is still out on that one for me.  So I dodged it with a No, I am keeping you abreast of my sexual activities as promised. Then she went into the STD factor of the men.  I am discussing this in wild details more with her then I have with Hubby.  To him, I just announced that Sassyslut and I are gonna have a MFM party.  He gets that its all about having fun.  And in doing so there are some risks you take. 

It’s funny, I felt obligated to tell her about it because it is common courtesy to do so but if she was going to throw a fit about it.   It would not stop me from doing it.  Only Hubby has that authority over me.

Drama of Sheman

So I haven’t been talking about Sheman much.. and its cause we have had a small hiatus while working, school work, kids, life, hubby.. and being a total heinous bitch.  I have no clue why I went to such a crabby bitchy mean as shit mode but its been just that and no one was safe.

Until I got my mojo back.  Then I was a lot more personable and ME! I am a very fun person.  Hilariously fun person in fact.  Those that know me knew I was going thru some frigged up phase that was messing with all my slutty activities. 

Well Sheman and I began paling around again.  She has moved into her apt but I am too chicken to go there. Well not chicken.. just not ready.  We had this discussion and I told her I don’t want to have sex with her yet.  I wasn’t ready.  Why?  My track record showed that any one I was really interested in became such a sexual disappointment.  I don’t want her to be one.  So I am ok with abstaining..  for now.   But boy its there now, tickling the edge of my subconscious to just jump her ass and get it over with.

I had issues with the other woman keeping her at her beck and call.  She is using this gal’s car, taking care of her house and kids.  It was like she was being owned and any time I asked for us to do something, she interfered some how.   Once she moved into her home I was more at eased with her and able to do things with her.

That’s when things hit the fan with her.  Her .. dang.. I gotta have a name for her. I will call her Kat.  Kat is a married woman, like myself and has the freedom to date other women.  Her husband is totally ok with this.  So they have a conditional Open Marriage that allows her to have relationships with women but no men.  I met her close to two years ago and did not find her interesting enough to want to date.  Her husband I believe does not date anyone.

Sheman doesn’t care for him and I have grown not to care for Kat either.  I tried pointing out to Sheman that she was the nanny/house keeper/at Kat’s beck and call.  Sheman denied it up until recently.  Due to our frequent in person contacts, Kat has had some reservations.  She has this conversation with Sheman where she professed her love to her.  Sheman told her she loved her too.   Surprisingly I don’t find that upsetting.  The next thing that comes outta Sheman is that she had made a promise sometime ago that she can’t keep now.  After much prodding she tells me that she promised “exclusive commitment when they professed love to one another”. 

This I found upsetting.  I gave her the riot act on how she says stupid shit in the heat of the moment and now she fucked everything up.  Kat wants me outta the picture and to keep Sheman all to herself.  I told her that this is her decision.  It’s interesting how I find myself sure that I will not be kicked to the curb with her.  So I had to coach her to fix the relationship with Kat.  

Turns out Kat is afraid I will steal Sheman away from her.  Lord.. That is such a dumb ass reason to put a ultimatium on a person. I have no intentions of doing that, even if I had those deep feelings. I would never do that.  Sheman has her own life to live.  If she wants to be a part of mine, great!  If not she is free to go.  You can’t stop a person from moving on.

So for now, we are casually dating and enjoying each other’s company.  She’s slowly integrating herself into my family and she has been well received.  I don’t see it ending anytime soon.  And as my twin said earlier today, Sheman is the longest interest in another person that I have had other than my hubby.  Hmmm…

A year of Changes

I realized that its been a full year of my twin and I becoming friends.  During this time frame we became quite chatting and learned all about each other.  We both are in an Open Marriage with husbands that just don’t think like the majority.

Over time it came more apparent that her situation was very different from mine.  She has an intimacy deficiency in her relationship while mine does not lack in that department.  Her man has lots of issues where my man doesn’t.  She realised she is very subservient as a lover and I am more dominating.

In the sexual realm, we both started out with a an entourage of men chasing us.  She loves to travel to meet them and I don’t.  My sexual exploits were one nightmarish experience after another.  Where her’s flourished to the point that she found one man who fulfills her needs and she entered the world of  BDSM.  My sexual needs seem to have petered off to just wanting to be with my husband. 

I used to love playing with my vibrator and that even disinterest me.  Orgasm with my husband are like a high.  The vibrator brings on more superficial orgasms.  It’s so interesting how I came to this point.  Energizer and Duracell are pretty pissed at me for their lost in sales.  But I can’t help it!

This past weekend there was a poly gathering and I had all intentions of going but the sitter did a no-show.  The gathering had the option to bring the kids but I didn’t feel comfy with that and opted to just sending hubby instead.  It’s amazing how the group is growing but I didn’t feel like going.  I would just love to sit back and watch my husband have his fun. 

It’s almost like this ran its course with me.   Or these lame ass dating sites have jaded me to the point that I am content with what I have. 

Since the last posing, Sheman has finally understood that her psycho behavior with me is unacceptable.  She even went as far as to purchase scented candles that smell like me.  I kept thinking about the last time we were together and one thing really had me on edge.  When she had me in her death grip she had this look in her eyes that really scared me.   After talking with hubby and several friends about her.  I came to realise she’s one of those people who live life in the fast lane.  Loves too quickly and makes crazy decisions.  I think her being a friend is all  I can handle.  She’s killed everything else with me. 

I won’t say I am out of the sex lane.  Since there are a few fun people I want to play with.  I just am not interested in meeting anyone new.  The games and bullshit is all old and I need to concentrate on what I want to provide for my family more.  I still flirt with my old lover, Big Daddy and chat with some poly folks.  So I don’t think I will be lacking in entertainment.

So who knows.  I live life a day at a time with this.

Shits and Giggles

Lord.. I just have to do this so that those people out there can see whats available for women like me looking for a little fun outside the marriage.

I received this email to my profile on a dating site:

 hi. i like what u wrote to me and your profile. it would have to be one on one discrete as i am married but not into open relationship as this would ruin my marriage. i do love her and so forth but i would like to get with another for discrete times when possible. i will tell you like my profile says. i am very much into spanking erotic or bit more. specially my cute little ass or yours possibly over the knee. gets things worked up more i think. only twp problems r i cant drive medical wise at this time due to pmh with brain surgery. hard to explain but send me email at bareandover@XXXX.com plus distance might be problem. i am in upper XX. beau

I of course laughed my ass off and sent it several gf’s with a note attached stating, “Is this guy for real!?”   So many things wrong with this response.  But overall it was DELETE and move on.

Checking out the next response.. He states I sparked his interest.  Gives me his email addy and his phone number. (will ignore that part and check out this profile)  OMFG! I am so tempted to post the man’s picture here.  But I won’t.  He has a roaming eye that would drive me nuts.  But the worst part is that his Attention line is this “i am looking for that special someone that is out there but will settle for amything else”   err, yeah..  DELETE!

Next one looked like he responded from his nursing home.   DELETE!  And several others that were automatic deletes, either due to their looks, location or lack of picture. 

Anyways, this was to lighten up the mood for the week.

A new Rule? Seriously?!

So I get a text today from a gf that informs me about an old.. err.. acquaintance of mine.   Ok so he was a potential boyfriend.  We met via some crappy online dating site that I no longer prowl due to this unfortunate incident.

So this was around last summer that this all took place.  See, here was this single fella that was buff as hell and was really photogenic and had not dated in years.  We text back and forth for a few days and talked on the phone and he was all sorts of sweetness.  I was in a state of excitement thinking I found a good one.

I even asked for the cock shot which the picture was very nice.  Almost like it was professionally done.  It was that pretty to look at!  I of course shared it with all my girl friends as they oo’ed and ah’ed as I was doing. 

My thing with him was that he was not local.  He was in fact about and hour or so away.  But this was way before I put in effect my MUST BE LOCAL rule so I was really digging the guy. 

Our first initial meeting went nice.  He came to my local hole in the wall dive bar that I frequented and we hung out some and he was cute, genuine and really paying attention to me.  He took forever to get to my bar and only stayed for an hour or so but I was ok with that.  He was a hyper guy.  Fast talker, mover and rambled a bit but I thought that was due to being nervous.  He was excited to hook up with me but insisted that our first meet that no sex was going to happen.  I truly enjoyed the man.

Our last meeting was so weird.. so wrong..  He showed up but did not come up to me and I had not clue he was at the bar.  My friends had to point him out to me and he smiled at me across the crowd room.  I had gone to him and we hugged and I believe he bought me a drink but this was a year ago and the exact details of this night were foggy.  He wanted to play pool and I was fine with that.  I hung with my friends while he started pounding back the beers and playing pool.  As the night wore on, I found myself wondering WTF is this man doing?!  So I dragged him away from his game and took him outside. 

The man was so wired that he could not focus on me at all.  He wanted to watch the baseball game on the TV, play pool and text his son who was having issues at his college.  All I could think of was Hello!?  Me! Standing here!!  No wonder you are fucking single and haven’t been laid in a decade! 

I finally said ya know.. this is not ok and I don’t like being ignored.  He then decides to cram his tongue down my throat as his teeth scrap up against my lips and I yanked my head to the side in disgust.  He was all apologetic saying that he knew I don’t like kissing like that and blah blah blah.. 

All I remember is telling him to go back to his game and I went the bathroom to wash my mouth.  I had told my friends this was bullshit and I was outta there and had gone home.  Spilling the story to my husband, I shut my phone off because I did not want to hear it.

In the morning I turned it back on and was bombarded with texts from him apologizing and claiming that whatever my girlfriend (who is my best friend and a total slut) was saying was not true.  He forward all these text from her to me and I was sickened. I first shut him up by having my husband telling him to fuck off.   Then confronted my friend.

My girl decided to pick up what I discarded, this was because he saw a picture of her and I, and he chose me.  She couldn’t handle that aspect and wanted to conquer him.  I didn’t care she could have him. 

She is a fantastic liar though, and finding out the truth from her is very hard.  I didn’t talk to her for about a month just so I could detach myself from the lunacy.  She came back to tell me that this man stalked her and she had to have a restraining order placed on him.  It also turns out that his name was not the name he gave me.  And today I also find out the mother fucker is married. 

So ya see why I am so frigging jaded!?  This is what is out there for us women to deal with!  I have this unbelievable way of attracting all sorts of lunatics.  And to weed them out I have to now include a new rule.   I want to see your Driver’s license.  If you have nothing to hide from me and are being totally honest.  Then lemme see the ID honey.  If not then guess what buddy, you are not getting in this pants.

How sad is that!?

Wine Revelations

Today I went to a local wine festival with my twin and her hubby.  They are in an Open marriage where she has found love with another man and now considers herself poly.  This is where we differ.  I have such a deep loving relationship with my husband that  I do not feel this emotional attachment to another person nor do I think I ever would.   I have such a rare man who I don’t see any man or woman coming close to being what he is.  If I were to lose him tomorrow, for any reason, I would be lost and inconsolable for a very long time.  And with saying that  I know I would never marry again.

Chatting with my Twin, she tells me her hubby is now in the market to date.  Their situation is fairly new being about 2 to 3 years in Opening their marriage.   She was very ready for this Openness where he had to silently cope with the dynamics of this change in their relationship.  I find it fascinating to be witnessing her counterpart venturing out and becoming a man per say. 

I say this because he is such a quiet man with plenty of insecurities and issues.  My first meeting of him was disappointing.  No eye contact, mumbled a lot and really could not interact.  The next several times I have seen him he progressively became better with the eye contact and some interaction.  Spending the day with him was really not something I wanted to do and made sure to pass on to him that he would have to loosen up.  It was a day to let down our hair and taste some wines.  And I have to say he surprised me with his conversations and interacting with me.   I liked him! 

By the end of our time tasting as much wine as possible, I was quite tipsy.  I would not say I was drunk but I was quite grateful for our Designated Driver (her hubby) to cart our happy asses back to the car.  On our way out I asked them if they were hungry, and they said no, but I sorta was.  I had a munchy craving so to speak.   So they treated me to Arby’s which I never had before.   I ended up sharing the sandwich and the fries with her hubby while chatting away with Twin.

We stopped at gas station due to Twin needing a potty break and I took this opportunity to get more acquainted with Hubby.  I pretty much just threw myself into his lap and started kissing him.  He kissed pretty well with some tongue but not all crazy down the throat tongue kissing.  I let his hands roam and I did the same to him, which was all nice  too!  He then stopped me and told me Twin was coming back.  So I stopped and got back into my seat.  Twin laughed and asked if she should go back into the gas station or go for a walk.  I don’t remember which but that was nixed and off we went.

Apparently I made the man’s day by doing this.  I felt no pressure from him and I totally enjoyed it.  He is a safe toy to play with.  Discussing this further with Twin later on, I came to the conclusion that perhaps the circles I have been going in is not where I should be.  Dating single men is so wrong for me.  Dating POLY people is so right. 

I believe this is what I have been missing.  I also believe that I cannot handle someone unattached because I do not want to be their center of attention.  My life is very full already.  Any secondary person entering my life must understand that I have to be secondary for them as well.  By doing this I believe the pressure and chaos of crazy relationships will even out.